"It's not MY fault!"

I just read a status update on a friends facebook page where she was saying that she was following a car today who's rear end was buckled.  Above the buckled rear end someone had written, "This Was Not Our Fault!"  I thought this was funny, and said that wouldn't it be good if we could put a sign over all our "incidents" in life like that! 

It isn't always our fault when things happen (as we know), but we are usually quick to say that it wasn't our fault!  I had a 'friend' when I was younger who always was right.  You know the type of friend I mean?  Well, I was in high school and I saw this friend a few times a week at church things, but for some reason every week on at least one of those times we would have an argument, which of course I NEVER won and I would go home and be sooo angry at her because I either knew I was right about it or that I knew she was and I hated that she was ALWAYS right!  However, my very gracious mother would listen to my grievences and then tell me to call her to apologise.  Can you believe that???  The thing was though, that I always would.  Which didn't help her any I guess, because she then continued through life thinking she really was always right.  Mum was right to make me do that when it was actually my fault.  But what did this situation teach me?  I would like to tell you that it taught me wonderfully spiritual things that I could impart to you, but alas, no.  I did learn things though.  I learnt never to argue with anyone because I wouldn't win.  I learnt to say, "Sorry friend, it was my fault".  I learnt to just suck it up and keep the peace. (Which isn't always a bad thing.)

Please don't misunderstand me and think that I never say "It's not my fault!" because I do, even (shamefully) when sometimes it is my fault and I have had to go to someone and admit I am in the wrong when I am.  However, through out the years since the situation with this 'friend' I have found myself being told that it IS my fault from the enemy ALOT!!!  I am sure this is a very common tactic that he uses with us too.  Am I right, or is it just me?  However, I think that God has been teaching me to be wiser, and know when it is or it isn't my fault.  A few months ago a situation arose with another person who also likes to often feel they are 'right' and we had a bit of a disagreement, and afterwards for a few days I knew things weren't peaceful between us and I knew they had to be put right.  So, what do you think my brain and every part of me was saying? That's right, "Debbie, call her and tell her you are sorry, assume the fault so things will be peaceful and you can move on!"  I grappled with this for days, but something else in me was saying, "NO!!! This isn't your fault, and you stand your ground here!"  I prayed and prayed and the more I prayed the louder the voice telling me to stand my ground got.  By the weekend, that person ended up apologising to me and saying it was their fault.  

I guess what I am saying is that either way, if it is, or it isn't your fault, think twice about it before putting up the sign. We can make ourselves look guiltier if we hastily put up the "Isn't my fault" sign without thinking, but we can also hinder someone else's growth if we put up the "It is my fault" sign too quickly as well.